Unhappy Lieutenant

Unhappy Lieutenant

Postby Zorana » Wed Apr 02, 2003 9:11 pm

He leaned back against the tree, feeling the press of ancient bark against his shoulderblades, and rolled the blade of grass between his fingertips. He was watching the sun rise, watching the way the colors played over the rooftops and windows of the houses of Myrken town. He inhaled, reveling in the sharp scent of human life, combated by the fresh breeze blowing over the barely budding treetops. Still, he could not distract himself with such pleasant thoughts for long. There were vampires to be killing. Little wimpy ones, he supposed, or else they wouldn't succeed at all...

He plucked a new blade of grass, and dangled it from the corner of his mouth. Habit, and not necessarily the most hygenic habit, but who was he to care? His fingertips brushed over the worn leather of his hat brim, that very article cast aside when the shadow across his face had interfered with his view of the morning sun.

"I 'ad to use my imagination, elf girl," he said, to the air, as if she were there to speak to. "I 'ad to imagine them sitting there in nothing but the god's good graces to amuse myself during that stupid meeting. Not a man 'oo could make a real decision among the lot of them. Oh, aye, they'll make all manner of happy decisions to impress the new Prince and free his prisoner, even 'old special council meetings for 'im, but not a one of them'll even blink when the half-elf in the Guardsman's uniform speaks up."

"Yeah, I 'ad to imagine that I mattered to 'em, or that they 'ad any sense to think. 'Ow the 'ell do they expect the Captai... err, Prince t'be able to deal with those..." He shuddered, "Atrocious barbarians if 'e 'as to stay 'ere to Captain their Guard. And deal with their vampires and murders and thefts and kidnappings, meanwhile. From what I gathered, they already unofficially fired 'im. But no, they can't take ten minutes out of the rest of their evenings so that they could say," He affected a very arrogant, noble accent, " 'Why, yes. That man there, Matthew Duvall. He'd make a very nice Captain. Do let him get to commanding those men, now.' Or even, 'ell, 'Joshua Kilborn, why, he helped kill four vahmpires. He'd make a great Captain!' Anything. But no. Of course not."

He snorted. "No, they 'ad to make it more difficult for the whole lot of us. And especially the Cap.. Prince. I'm sure 'e wants to go home to New Dauntless and warn 'is people, gather 'is armies... save the world. It's what 'e's good at. Saving things." He spit the grass blade from the corner of his lips, and glared in the direction of the Judiciary meetinghouse. "That's what I think of that lot of lummoxes."

He lifted one hand, to reflexively rub his jaw. He had a little bit of stubble, and smiled faintly. "At least I won't look like a girl anymore. Blasted pretty face..." He shook his head, flinging his hair, which just covered the tips of slightly pointed ears. He looked over to the side, and picked up his hat, resolutely shoving it down over his head. He leaned back again and tugged the brim low to shadow his eyes.

"Back to using my imagination," he whispered. "Imagine what a good Captain I might make, if prissy noblemen had any sense." Best to get a nap in while the morning sunlight streamed down upon him. They'd be hunting as soon as it got closer to sundown.
Did you ever wonder what happens when there's dirt on the "Bat Signal?" It wouldn't even look like a bat anymore. Maybe they'd accidentally summon a superhero named "Misshapen Blob Man." I bet he weighs 900 lbs. and comes in the "Misshapen Blobmobile." And the cops go, "Aaah! Clean the lens!" And his theme could be the Batman song at about 10 R.P.M.

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Zorana
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